two confessions to saint john of kronstadt
Please save me from the fornicating enemy and from the sin of Sodom. Batiushka dear, I love one girl and, if I touch her, the flames of Hades and impurity burn me…I wish to be rid of this sin and I want to love with pure, divine love.
I have fallen in love passionately with her; I have fallen into the sin of adultery. I sinned with her through passionate kisses and sinful glances, we satisfied our desires in this way during the tie of the Divine Liturgy and at night [and] during your mass confession. Even during Great Lent I spent time with her during your service and during communion when everyone was repenting, I was sinning…I had condemned others, saying how could a maiden love another maiden and for my condemnation I fell into the same sin.
taken from Nadieszda Kizenko’s ‘Written Confessions and the Construction of Sacred Narrative’ in the book Sacred Stories: Religion and Spirituality in Modern Russia, edited by Mark D. Steinberg and Heather J. Coleman.